Did you ever see the old If programming languages were cars jokes? For example:
Ada is a tank. A butt-ugly tank that never breaks down. People laugh uncontrollably if you tell them you drive Ada, but really, do you want to be driving a sports car in a war zone?
C is a racing car that goes incredibly fast but breaks down every fifty miles.
C# is a competing model of family station wagons. Once you use this, you're never allowed to use the competitors' products again.
C++ is a souped-up version of the C racing car with dozens of extra features that only breaks down every 250 miles, but when it does, nobody can figure out what went wrong.
Forth is a car you build yourself from a kit. Your car doesn't have to look or behave like anyone else's car. However, a Forth car will only go backwards (FORTH LOVE IF HONK THEN !)
Of course I show only a small sample here... some of these are really funny. The reason I mention this is that our old chum Jay Dowling just pointed me at a somewhat related site If programming languages were religions. Once again, some of these brought a wry grin to my lips:
APL would be Scientology – There are many people who claim to follow it, but you've always suspected that it's a huge and elaborate prank that got out of control.
Lisp would be Zen Buddhism – There is no syntax, there is no centralization of dogma, there are no deities to worship. The entire universe is there at your reach - if only you are enlightened enough to grasp it. Some say that it's not a language at all; others say that it's the only language that makes sense.
Haskell would be Taoism – It is so different from other languages that many people don't understand how can anyone use it to produce anything useful. Its followers believe that it's the true path to wisdom, but that wisdom is beyond the grasp of most mortals.
Erlang would be Hinduism – It's another strange language that doesn't look like it could be used for anything, but unlike most other modern languages, it's built around the concept of multiple simultaneous deities.
As before, I show only a small sample of the various languages here...
Questions? Comments? Feel free to email me – Clive "Max" Maxfield – at email@example.com). And, of course, if you haven't already done so, don't forget to Sign Up