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Max The Magnificent
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Re: Clumsy cats
Max The Magnificent   3/28/2014 11:50:05 AM
@David: ...he mistimed it completly, missed the kid, and went sailing down the stairs...


Did you ever see that joke on the Internet -- instructions for cleaning your toilet -- it starter by adding a 1/2 cup of dishwasher detergent -- then put the cat in and lower the toilet lid and sit on it (it said "the cat will self-agitate") -- then "repeat as often as necessary" .... at the bottom it was signed "The Dog" LOL

David Brown
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Clumsy cats
David Brown   3/28/2014 10:56:08 AM
Most cats dislike water, but some - like our cat - quite like playing with a running tap or fishing things out the sink.  But no cats like getting soaked, or falling in the bath.  Falling in the bath once can be considered an accident, but our cat has managed it twice.  He has also fallen down the toilet twice.  I have seen him walk across people's laps and fall off, and trip over toys on the floor.  Most cats take pride in walking silently - our cat can be heard tramping up the stairs from the other side of the house.


Ambushing our six-year-old is a favourite hobby (of the cat's, not the kid's), but he is not very good at it.  I saw him hide behind a chair then leap out as the kid walked past - he mistimed it completly, missed the kid, and went sailing down the stairs.  It is all highly entertaining, but I am glad we don't have to rely on him as a mouser!


Max The Magnificent
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Re: You need this joke
Max The Magnificent   3/23/2014 2:44:32 PM
@betajet: He said: "Could you put him on?  I need directions."

I'm laughing through my tears :-)

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You need this joke
betajet   3/21/2014 6:52:28 PM
Once there was a man who really hated his wife's cat.  So one day he decided to get rid of it.  He took the cat, put it in the car, drove 5 miles away and dumped it.

When he got home, the cat was quietly napping on the front porch.

So he tried again.  This time he drove 10 miles away and dumped it.  When he got home, there was the cat again, sitting on the porch washing its privates.

The man decided to really do it this time.   He drove 100 miles away, dumped the cat, and got hopelessly lost driving home.

He finally found a phone [old joke] and called home.  His wife answered.  He asked her if the cat was there.  She said yes.  He said: "Could you put him on?  I need directions."

Max The Magnificent
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Re: Include me out
Max The Magnificent   3/21/2014 6:17:13 PM
@antedeluvian: I am afraid I ca't join you club.

You are always welcome in my club, even if your wife is not a cat-lover (actually, that means she can join as well :-)

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Include me out
antedeluvian   3/21/2014 6:10:20 PM

I am afraid I can't join your club. My wife is indifferent to animals, actaully that is an undertstatement. She will tolerate their presence as long as they don't make contact. She is not even interested in our granddog (my son's dog).

I am very definitely a dog person. My father got a mouser for his factory and would occasionally bring it home. Initially he was called "Lucky" probably because he was rescued from the SPCA. I learned that no matter how much loving you gave a cat there was always this unpredictable response resulting in pain and bloodletting. I renamed him "Tiger" (as a 7 year old without much imagination). Later he got sick and then better and the secretary at the factory gave him the name Thomas after the New Testatment quote "Thomas is himself again". But after Lucky Tiger Thomas I have also been very cautious of cats.


In fact I heard on a radio interview that after a while of stroking a cat the brain chemistry of the cat changes introducing some chemical that makes them agressive. I don't klnow if that is true, but I believe it.


On the other hand my sister (also savaged by Lucky Tiger Thomas) did becaome a cat person, so maybe I can be an associate member of the club. She always has three cats in her house as the status quo. Some have characters that are less militaristic than others but I am cautious. There was Roger who got hit by a car and had reconstructive surgery (using a Meccano set, judging by the feel) for sveral thousand dollars. Did Roger show any gratitude? One day Roger disappeared. My sister put up signs around the neighbourhood (after she had an investement in him) and got a phonecall- there was this family that had just moved aboput 200 miles away. Roger was always at their house and so they thought he was a stray and moved with him.  You guessed it- "The Cat Came Back" (check the link for an Oscar nominated animation).

Now ask me about dogs. Those I can talk about.



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