It is an undeniable fact that man is a simple creature, while women are far more sophisticated and complex.
I must admit that I was carried away on a wave of excitement. I used Visio to whip up images of my various switches and knobs and meters and suchlike; then I printed them off, cut them out, and spent a happy time arranging them on a poster-board mockup of the front of my 1929 radio cabinet as shown below:
On the left hand side of the upper portion of this image we have a column of antique toggle switches with small white balls on the ends of the switches (these look really cool in real life). To the right of these, we find a column of 16-way rotary switches or potentiometers (I've not decided which to use yet). Then we have some more toggle switches mounted horizontally, with a strange antique switch "thing" in the middle (this is currently on its way to me from Canada, so I don't have the accurate dimensions for it yet). On the right hand side we have three analog meters.
In the lower portion of the image we have two more meters and four momentary push buttons. Close-up views of some of these elements are illustrated in the image below, which presents a toggle switch on the left, a momentary push-button in the middle, and a rotary switch (or potentiometer) on the right:
Each of the toggle switches and momentary push buttons will have an associated small brass panel along with two NeoPixel LEDs mounted behind translucent dots. Meanwhile, each of the rotary switches will have a circular brass panel with 16 LEDs presented in the form of a NeoPixel Ring.
The portion of the device that is to be mounted in the radio cabinet is going to be called The Pedagogical and Phantasmagorical Inamorata Prognostication Engine (Mark 1). The idea is to try to manipulate the switches and knobs in such a way as to get all of the analog meters in their "green zones" at the same time. Unfortunately, although one might get tantalizingly close, it has to be admitted that one's odds are a tad on the slim side, not the least that the system doesn't come with any instructions and the functions of the various knobs and switches may (or may not) transmogrify over time.
On the bright side, the Prognostication Engine will include a real-time clock and have knowledge of the current day and time, and one's chances will improve somewhat around the time of a blue moon (the next three blue moons will occur on May 21, 2016; May 18, 2019; and August 22, 2021; which just goes to show that there's always hope).
I'm sure we will be discussing the underlying algorithms controlling this beast in a future column. In the meantime, none of the various elements or functions are currently defined, with the exception of the Modestly Sized Red Button ("Pusheth Noteth") and the largest Emotional Status meter (which will span the entire range of emotion from "Disgruntled" to "Fully Gruntled"). So, if you have any suggestions, now would be a good time to add them into the pot.
— Max Maxfield, Editor of All Things Fun & Interesting