Spoof: Top 10 fears of today’s engineers

It’s that time of the year again when engineers air their most secret fears in the darkest corners of the forest. This time, though, a journalist was lurking in the woods and heard the secret whispers of some engineers, including an unidentified freshly minted engineer and a mid-career engineer at an unknown company.

Other engineers at Apple Inc., Advanced Micro Devices Inc., Foxconn Technology Group, Intel Inc., Microsoft Inc., Motorola Inc., Nokia Corp. and Rambus Inc. also were caught unawares expressing their fears about events at their companies or in the market. Do you have any work-related engineering fears to share with me? Post them below.

Apple engineer: Someone will misplace the iPhone 5 or forget it during a vacation in Disneyland. Will it be me?

Intel engineer: I helped Intel beat AMD but do I have the energy to take on ARM?

AMD engineer: This Global Foundry alliance with Abu Dhabi’s Advanced Technology Investment Corp., is a bit unnerving. I’ll do anything for my company but do I really have to learn Arabic?

Microsoft engineer: Can I be honest with HR and tell them I want Apple stock options instead of Microsoft’s?

Nokia engineer: If I cannot have an iPhone can I get the Droid X for Christmas?

Rambus engineer: We beat Nvidia Corp. at the International Trade Commission. Hurrah! What did the CEO say that meant again?

Foxconn engineer: Apple is a great customer. I love them too but am I risking my life by offering to guard the prototype for iPhone 17?

Motorola engineer: The Droid X is a commercial hit. Can I tell the company we don’t need another 5-year break?

Mid-career engineer: I want a corner office too but must it be in Chengdu, China?

New engineer: Is it all right to tell the recruiter I don’t aspire to a corner office and that I am happy with any cubicle as long as I don’t get a pink slip in the next five years?