So international observers are sent in to monitor the elections and hopefully prevent the abuses. Hey, we're not talking about elections in Iraq or Afghanistan — we're talking about the coming presidential elections right here at home. Sometimes we speak about our values with forked tongue.

Rigging elections is an American tradition. In my old neighborhood in Chicago one might stay on the voter rolls decades after death. Think it was something like going to purgatory before a slot opens up in heaven. Sixty years ago when my dad, a born-again Democrat, ran for state office, several of his buddies from

the VFW called to report unusual counting activity at their polling places. Think the practice had something to do with a "come in with a good count" request backed by a fistful of greenbacks. He lost.

Ganging up
In later years, I'm told, in some communities across this great land local gangs were most effective in delivering votes, possibly in response to those who were trying to keep their neighbors away from the polls. Or it may have been 50-bucks-a-head piece work. American ingenuity at its best.

Ralph Nader gets aced out of Pennsylvania because of gigantic Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck registration irregularities. Was it the work of overeager Nader volunteers or the dirty tricks squad? What do you think?

In politics it's anything goes and both parties pull out all the stops to gain or maintain power. They lie, sling hate, work at keeping the promises they make to their contributors and more often than not break the promises they make to the voters. They figure the average voter is stupid and will swallow anything as long as the message is a 20-second sound bite.

Washington politics does something to the human spirit. A popular Texas governor, skilled at bringing people to-gether, goes to Washington and the town turns him into a divider. What kind of town is that, what kind of a nation have we become? Maybe we should move the capital to Austin or Cleveland.

When Frank isn't poring over his absentee ballot, he can be reached at fburge@cmp.com.