If the sales budget hadn't been cut, we might have been able to afford real people in the convention booth.
Team EETnet: Ditto

To spur demand for the retro-styled IMac computers, Apple designs and markets retro consumers.
David C. Barber, Employed Consultant, San Diego

The two final witnesses called by Microsoft prepare to enter the courtroom.
Brian Kowald, TiltRac Corp., Carrollton, Texas

The employment ad said you'd have to stick your neck out to get a job interview with King Bill, but this is ridiculous.
Frank Swanson, HAL Computer Systems

Looks like the PC SYSADMINS got their heads stuck in the Unix plotter again.
Jorge Luis Rodriguez, Texas Instruments Inc., Dallas

Lab exercise from Networking For Dummies
Gerard Drewek, Senior Design Engineer, General Dynamics, Bloomington, Minn.

Exhibit 'A' depicts carpal neck syndrome. This after thousands of touch-screen manuals were released with a typo asking users to use their nose to make selections.
Johnny Ancich, Dalsa Inc., Waterloo, Ontario

These new-product announcements bore me to tears. Let's grab a couple of "longnecks" and come back when they unveil the next "processor to end all processors."
Bill Adams, Valley Recreation Products, Sycamore, Ill.

Hmmph! Rubberneckers! Those two haven't had an original design thought since they were sophomores!
Roger Depauw, Silicon Graphics, Chippewa Falls, Wis.

In utmost secrecy, and cleverly disguised, Bill Gates and Janet Reno meet to discuss the Microsoft antitrust settlement. Scott McNealy and Jim Barksdale look on. (You pick out Janet Reno).
Paul Goscinski, National Marine Fisheries Service, Narragansett, R.I.

The Original Inter-Net Protocol.
Breck Toy, Seagate Recording Media, Anaheim, Calif.

"OpenGL, SchmopenGL. They still look like stiffs to me."
Phil Plumbo, Printware Inc., St. Paul, Minn.

You have to stick your neck way out to only use 2-D modeling.
Larry W. Anderson, Siemens Power Transmission & Distribution, LLC, Charlotte, N.C.

The new director of marketing's idea of a functional model.
Robert Aldridge, Profold Inc., Sebastian, Fla.

Mrs. Tripp, are you sure the Radio Shack wireless mike will work fine?
Jackson Leung, Nanya Technology Corp. USA, Sugar Land, Texas

Now Sarah and Lynn . . . now they stuck their necks out for women in engineering.
Frank Greco, Crossroads Technologies Inc., New York

It was curtains for the 2-D graphics core with its twin bottlenecks when the sophisticated 3-D version debuted.
Jim Helman, Network Computer Inc.

As soon as these two discover 3Dfx, they will want our seats.
Bernard Burreson, Eldec Corp., Lynnwood, Wash.

The 3-D models were faced with limited net resources.
Ken Giesbers, Computer Resources, The Boeing Co., Seattle

Superficial up-front design often results in bottlenecks.
Bob Goates, Senior Software Engineer, Echostar Communications, Cheyenne, Wyo.

The job calls for NEC experience, not NECK experience!
Joseph Kusmiss, Mitre Corp., Bedford, Mass.

Impressed are The Judges that many were alert enough to notice the new address for submissions. And yes, this change did cause the lengthy gap in IW's appearance. When the new scribe submitted the parchment with your captions, he brought Not the keys to the nectar drawer, but donuts.

Psychologists feel full recovery is nigh.

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Immortal Works Archive

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